Miss Independent

I love, love, love living with Beth. It is honkin awesome. We have so much fun together. We had our first grocery shopping experience together on Friday. I stayed up every night til 4 am getting my room done. There are still a few things left to do, but for the most part, I am finished. Also, God rocks. It is hot at the house and being 100 years old, we aren't blessed with Central heating and air. So, I was wondering how I was going to survive. My grandma gave me three fans, but they weren't helping much... and I can't afford an air conditioner. So, my friend drives an hour and a half to bring me one.. for FREE. Props to Nicholas for helping me out.

House Warming

Hey Guys,
Tonight will be my first official night in my new place. I will be sleeping in my new room, with pictures everywhere, taking a shower in my own bathroom, eating at my own table, watching my own TV. I am super excited and so is Beth. Living with her is going to be a hoot. I want you all to see it.

Joining the world of the "Big Girls"

So, I will be moving in with Beth next weekend. I am scared and excited all at the same time. It's gonna be fun, however I have to bust my butt. I wrote out a budget and am gonna have to cut down on my social activities, but it will definitely be worth it. Beth is great and we get along so well, I am sure we will have a blast. I am "growing up" as they say. So many big things have happened in my life recently.. from getting my Driver's License, graduating college, getting a "real" job and now moving out. I will keep you posted about how things go. Just say a little prayer for me, please..

Peace out!!

Randomness

So, I finally got to see Stars Wars:Return of the Sith this weekend, and I actually enjoyed it. Which is wierd, considering that isn't my type of thing. Batman comes out on Friday... now that is right up my alley. So, guess what my wonderful, loving, sweetie of a boyfriend did this weekend? HE GOT A MOHAWK and he has curly hair, so imagine that. We ate at Olive Garden with his mom on Saturday and she hated it. I am kinda indifferent, I mean, I wouldn't get a mohawk, but it isn't my head. It suits his personality. He definitely likes to march to the beat of his own drum, but that's one of the things I love about him. Have to get back to work. Will post more later

Lessons from preschoolers

So, I have been doing Bible School this week at Chicopee, helping Anthony and Abby with the preschoolers. They are so cute and have an insatiable energy about them. They are curious, ask tons of questions and get amused by the simplest things. I used to be like that.. and then I grew up. Whenever I ask questions now, I am seen as either ignorant or annoying. Also, when I watch the kids sing songs about Jesus and ask questions about the Bible, I am taken aback. I wish I had that kind of enthusiasm for the Lord right now. I don't want to call what I am going through a valley.. it is worse than that. It is more like a miry pit. I am falling deeper and deeper and I can't get out, no matter how hard I try. I want to call for help, but something keeps me from doing that, and I can't for the life of me, figure out what it is. Anyways, just pray for me please

Lessons from preschoolers

Stressful Week

So, I found out last Tuesday that my brother who is in Iraq was involved in an accident about a month ago and almost died and almost lost his hearing. He is an armorer, in charge of weapons and one of his SSO's brought a loaded gun to him. Something (God ) told him to move out of the way. He did and the gun went off, sending the bullet through some packets of gatorade and the shrapnel hit his roomates leg. My brothers ears were bleeding and his equilibrium was off. He is ok thank God and suffered no long-term damage. I was just very upset that everyone else in my family knew about it except my dad and I. I called my sister in law and confronted her about it. She was really rude and stuff. Then, my brother called me that night and fussed me out (From Ir aq). I cried for two days.

I haven't talked to either one of them since. And now, my car is back in the shop.My week hasn't been going very well, but I am confident that it can only get better, right?

April flowers bring May lovers?

So, I have been thinking about marriage and weddings a lot lately. The fact that I went to Justin Lewallen's wedding on Saturday probably doesn't help matters much. I mean, ever since I was little I have had my wedding planned out. Dresses, bridesmaids, colors, flowers, etc... the whole nine yards. I also have my kids names picked out.. Chloe Ruth, Hannah Deborah and Ethan Isaiah. I have been listening to love songs and dreaming of my wedding. Don't worry, it isn't happening anytime soon or anything, I have just been thinking of it. And then there are all those around me who are about to tie the knot.. Abby and Anthony, Derrick and Ashlie, Tammy and Andrew, I could go on and on. So, I guess I will just keep dreaming of that special day and wait for it patiently. In the mean time I will have songs stuck in my head like " You look Wonderful Tonight," "To Make You Feel My Love" and " I Will Be Here."

The circle of life

I was reminded this week of " The Lion King" and how everything plays a part in the circle of life.. It's ironic that I thought of that since I have been dealing with a lot of change in friendships and situations lately. It's funny how you can be friends with someone for such a long time and then one day you find yourself noticing that you don't even know them at all. A lot of my friends are headed in different directions and have different plans for their lives. I am the kind of person who has this fairy-tale thought that I am going to be friends with everyone I am friends with now forever. However, it was in talking to Robert's mom last night that it occurred to me that most friendships are like the circle of life. They have a beginning and an end. Most friendships are for a season and don't last a lifetime. That is really hard for me to comprehend. So, now I am trying to deal with the fact that I may not be friends with everyone forever, so I should just cherish the friendship in the here and now.

I know this blog seemed like I was rambling, but this is where I am right now. BTW, please pray for me because there is a potential parapro job opening up and I will find out about it next week.

Opposites Attract

It's really funny to me how two people, who are completely opposite of one another, can be so incredibly happy together. This is Robert and I to a T. I love The Gaithers and country music (as you all know ). Speaking of, my man (Kenny Chesney) got married on Monday to Renee Zelwegger. And Robert loves 99 X and Zepplin, The Stones and Pink Floyd. I am an anal retentive neat freak and, well, he is the opposite. He loves to play video games and loves movies. I love hanging out with friends and being Dr. Love. But, when you put us two together, it is obvious that we really love each other and love being together. Anyways, enough mushy gushy stuff.

Heather, I guess you are glad to know that Bo Bice is still in the running for American Idol and the Clay Aiken wanna be got the boot. He still has a record deal, though, so his life is good right now.

moms are the best

Well, yesterday was pretty depressing for me. I cried.. ALOT!! I mean, it's been almost six years since I lost my mom, but some days it feels like only a second. I was thinking about everything I have learned from my mom and how much alike we are (were). Then, Pastor Doug did a sermon entitled "Table Lamps, marked Jeans and Clean Underwear," in which he told us of lessons learned from his mother in childhood, that he carries with him today. I realized that I am more like my mom than I ever thought. We both are sentamentalists. I was cleaning out her hope chest last week and discovered that she held on to the most interesting things, like invitations, cards, flower petals, old movie ticket stubs, coins from the arcade, old report cards.. stuff that others would think is weird. I do the same thing. We are also both people pleasers. We value our friendships and always have other peoples best interest at heart. Anyways, I can't explain to you how much I miss my mom. She was an amazing woman. She has definitely taught me alot and shaped me into the person I am today. So, be kind to your mothers, everyone, because they won't be around forever. Tell them you love them everytime you get a chance, spend time with her and let her know how important she is to you. I love you MOM!!

Hasta La Vista.. Gainesville College

Hi guys! I have some great news. Staying up til 1 am every night for a week for my Stats final paid off.. I got a C. Which means, two degrees, and no more Gainesville College. It is actually one of those bitter sweet moments of my life, ya know? After I have been there for four years, it is going to be weird not going back next semester. Oh well, hopefully, I will be teaching in August and living with Beth. Work is going good... we just came up with a new dance to celebrate bookings. We are adding choreography and a second verse.. it is called "Thank you Jesus." It is hilarious, and somewhat embarrassing, watching my boss and I dance around the office and sing. You had to be there. BTW, my parents are taking Robert and I out to dinner tonight. They haven't really gotten to know him that well. So, right now, I am just working and enjoying life. God is good!!!

Dr. Love strikes again!!

For those of you who don't know by now, I have become affectionately known as "Dr. Love." This stems from the fact that for the past two or three months now, everyone I know has been asking me for love advice, relationship advice, or advice about the opposite sex. I don't know how this came to be exactly, but I have taken it and ran with it. At least two or three times a week, I am called or confronted about a "love " issue. From " I like her, does she like me?" to " I don't get why he/she does...so and so" to "I am so mad at him/her I could kick his/her-----." I sit and patiently listen for hours as the distressed person pours out their heart to me. Then, I play devil's advocate, give them worse case scenaries and best case scenarios and leave the rest up to them. I don't tell them what to do or how to run their lives, I simply provide a listening ear and a shoulder to cry on.

I was taking a break from my Statistics marathon studying last night and grabbed a bite to eat with my friend Brooke. We were talking about the "Dr. Love" situation. I have been really stressed about finances lately, and a $945 credit card bill (Thanks to my car and Gainesville College) doesn't help any. She said that I should start charging for my " Dr. Love" sessions, like $5 per hour. Then, I wouldn't have to worry about bills. We laughed and continued to eat. Someone told me that this might be my calling. Too bad I'd have to spend four more years in college to make it happen.. I don't think so. I see my ability to listen and give advice as a blessing. I am glad that my friends trust me enough to tell me their problems and respect my opinion. So, if you ever need advice about anything concerning relationships, love or life in general, you know who to call.... DR. LOVE!!!

Weekend full of fun!!

My weekend was full of fun and busyness.. as usual. Friday was spent reminiscing over memories of my childhood. My friend Lauren and I looked through my baby pics and went through my moms hope chest, that was given to me when she died. We found my dad's old 8 tracks, napkins from my parents wedding 25 years ago, bday cards from my first bday, my mom's gradation gown and my dads diploma, my dresses and shoes from 22 years ago, scrapbooks, pics and more. Having lost my mom almost six years ago to cancer, I am so grateful for the fact that, like me, she kept things that may not mean anything to other people, but to us, they are priceless. I guess that is where I get my " organized pack rat" mode from. I have cards from elementary school, letters from Middle school, etc. Some people think I am crazy, but I want my kids to have things to remember me by, just like I have to remember my mom.

Then, on Saturday, I went shopping for my dad and stepmom's bday presents. They were born on the same day, two years apart, so they have a joint bday party every year. It was so much fun. We grilled hamburgers and hot dogs, with all the trimmings... baked beans, cole slaw, chips and dip.. and of course, double chocolate fudge cake. After the party, my friends and I went to Ben's houseboat on Lake Lanier to watch a movie. We had been the night before, where he cooked us jerk chicken and tallapia fish. It was amazing. However, being afraid of heights and getting motion sickness aren't a good combo. My head was spinning and my stomach was churning. Dramamine has become my new best friend. I will have to take it whenever I visit Ben. Then, yesterday was church. Then, Brooke and I went to visit our friend David, who just had knee surgery to fix his torn ACL. Last night, we went to service at Hebron, where the middle school choir had their concert.. it was really good. Then, we went to Beth's house and watched Mary Poppins.. another long, busy, fun weekend.

Now it is Monday and the weeks of finals. I made a 66 on my Stats test.. boo!! I have to study my butt off this week.. no social life for Amber... go straight to Inner G and straight home.. study, study, study... I NEED A C!!! PLEASE GOD, JUST A C!!!!

Accountability Partners

I am about to try to convince everyone who reads this blog to have an accountability partner of the same gender. I actually have 2, but I will tell you about one now. Lauren Hannah Dooley is the coolest girl ever. I have only known her for a few months, but we became instant friends. When I started dating Robert, she told me that it would be good to have an accountability partner to help me stay on track.. spiritually, mentally, emotionally, physically, etc. So, I talk to her at least every other day and she asks me questions about my walk with God, my quiet times, my scripture memorization that Anne and I are doing together and my relationship with Robert and my friends. I trust her so much, which is good. If I screw up one day, I can call her and tell her. She emails me or calls me with encouraging scriptures and passages, she prays with me and for me. I feel like I can tell her anything. Since we became accountability partners, I can see how much I have grown in my spiritual and fleshy walks. So, I would encourage everyone to find an accountability partner.. it is an awesome experience that I would suggest to anyone.

Update

Hey Guys and girls,
I have an update for you regarding my friends whom I asked for advice about.. the guy who had issues with picking up a girl and paying for her meals and a girl who is old fashioned and wouldn't budge. Well, unfortunately, the girl was incredibly turned off by the guys lack of chivalry and the guy was turned off by the girls lack of sensitivity, so they decided to just be friends. Weird, huh? The guy still wants to hang out with the girl, but he doesn't want to pay and doesn't want it to be a date. Does that sound like wanting your cake and eating it too? I don't know why people make relationships so complicated. I agree with Jen about the whole compromise thing. If both people in the relationship aren't willing to give a little and be flexible, then the relationship won't work. I think that is what happened in this case. Anyways, just wanted to give you an update.

I turned in my application at the BOE the other day, so now I am just waiting and praying for the full-time parapro job. I hung out a lot at Beth's house this weekend (the house I plan to move into if I get the above job in August). I can't wait. I just feel like it is time for me to move out and live life in the " World of the Big Girls." Whatever happens will happen for a reason. I am placing it all in God's hands. Gotta go to work now.. I am working an extra day to make more money.. another blessing in my life. Peace out!!

I love Poker

Well guys and gals.. I never thought I would say this, but I LOVE POKER!! I didn't even know how to play until Saturday night. And I kicked everyone's tails. We played five card draw, five-card stud, Texas Hold 'em and Omaha, Blackjack and some other games I don't remember. We played for pennies. Three hours later, as it was approaching 1 a.m., Dr. Love won it all. It's amazing how fast I picked the game up. Usually it takes me a while to figure games out, but not this one. Now, I don't think I am good enough to play with the pro's like, Heather Anne, Chris Brown, or Tank, but I was pretty proud of myself. Next time I play, I want to do what Heather does and play for something more worthwhile, like candy (preferably chocolate).

My social life and mad poker playing skills are weighing on my sleeping, however. My priorities seem to be a little off. I would rather hang out than sleep, well I wouldn't rather, but that's always what happens and it's beginning to take it's toll. I have decided to start working out again, quit Mountain Dew (which is going to be extremely hard ) and start drinking more H2O. I will feel better, have more energy, and perform better at school and work. My friends and social life are very important to me, but not at the cost of my health. So, if you see me and I have bags under my eyes and I look a little droopy, you will understand why. Just don't mention the words Mountain Dew in my presence and I will be ok. It's crazy that I am so addicted to the stuff.. it's like a drug or something.

Chivalry.. Is it dead?

I have a question for guys and girls, and I am sure that I will get a different answer from each gender... Do you think the guy should pick up the girl when taking her on a date, even if she lives far away from the guy? My friend is struggling with this very issue. She has been on two dates with this guy. He lives in Lilburn and she lives in Auburn. She feels that he has to pick her up for it to be a date. He wants her to meet his parents and have dinner with them, but he wants her to drive to his house, and she refuses. They have to find a compromise. She told him that he either picks her up, they hang out after church on Sundays, since they attend the same church, or they don't date at all. I was just wondering what you guys and girls thought about it. I personally think that the guy should pick up the girl. I am very old-fashioned and believe it is a sign of respect and it makes the girl feel special knowing that the guy cares enough to pick her up. I also think that after they have been dating for awhile and all that, it is cool if the girl wants to drive to meet the guy, or they can meet halfway. These people are really close to me and they have both asked me for advice and I don't know what to tell them.. Dr. Love is at a loss!! Amazing, isn't it? Your comments on this matter would be greatly appreciated.

I'm Back!!!!

God's really been teaching me about perspective lately and about how He can use a "bad" situation for good. For example, my friend Clint, whom I went to highschool with and just met back up with a few months ago, had an accident at work on Monday. A 1500 pound tool box from a truck fell on him. Guess what? All he got was a broken hand and a few scratches. He is truly blessed. He is having surgery today and getting pins put in his hand. Please say a prayer for him. The situation could have been a lot worse. It could have hit his head, given him brain damage, or even worse, killed him. God used his accident to help me realize that things can be worse than they are. I have been doing a lot of "wallowing" lately. In self-pity, in sadness, in depression.. whatever you want to call it and I am sick of it. I am ready to get back to my normal self and have a positive outlook on life again. I am tired of being unhappy, confused and stressed. I want my life back. I am truly blessed and I need to start looking at life in that way again. I want God to bring back my desire to study His word and memorize Bible verses.. because lately, I haven't had a desire to do any of that. It is affecting my life and those around me as well. So, although I had a momentary lapse of something, I am back and ready to tackle whatever life throws my way. It feels great to be back!!!!

what in the world?

This has been a week of stress and confusion for me. I am trying to save up money to move in with Beth in August and go to North Georgia. I am very thrifty and only spend money on neccessities, like gas, insurance, cc bill, etc. But, no matter how hard I try, something messes up my plan. My car just got out of the shop.. busted head gasket... $450 worth of repair. Now, I will be paying my cc bill off until I am 50. I know that everything happens for a reason and that I will learn something from this, I just wish I knew who it was that God was trying to teach me and I wish he would hurry it up!!! Anyways, I guess things could be worse, right? There is always someone who is worse off than you.. that' s what my mom used to tell me. She also said, "That which doesn't kill you will make you stronger." I must be as tough as nails, then. So, my weekend is chock full of fun and adventure. Dr. Love is the most social girl on the planet. Have a wonderful weekend and I will be back on Monday. Peace out!!!