I've been thinking

As I have been doing my women's bible study this week in preparation for Friday, God has hit me over the head with some of the verses. And, one of those verses happens to be one that a friend of mine told me to read just a few days ago. It's not a coincedence. God is good. So, the scripture is Romans 6. The entire thing relates to my life, but, more specifically, Romans 6: 14-" For sin shall not be your master, because you are not under law, but under grace."
Beth and I were talking the other night about how I struggle with committing the same sin over and over. I have been dealing with it since I was 15 years old. Romans 6 tells me that I am to die to my sin and enjoy my new life in Christ. If I am a Christian, then how can I continue to make the same mistake over and over? I have even started to question my salvation. It's crazy how one sin can spiral out of control. I don't know what to do. I feel so helpless. The spirit is willing, but the flesh is weak. I pray, ask for forgiveness, and somehow, find myself back in the same spot over and over again. What does this mean? Am I truly not saved? Am I just an idiot? Or, do I truly not get what it means to turn from my wicked ways?
What do you guys think... help, I am sinking here. I do feel convicted about this particular sin, but apparently, it isn't doing any good. Maybe I have just gotten comfortable with my sin and don't see it as a big deal anymore. I don't know..... I am sooooooooo confused!!!